Wednesday, October 15, 2014

this post is for her...

for grandma jackie. 

a year ago today, she left this earth and joined my grandpa in heaven. gosh that was a hard evening. getting the phone call from my dad that she had peacefully passed was gut wrenching and at the same time, it gave me so much comfort. she fought that darn cancer for too long. she dealt with so much pain and discomfort. i hated thinking about her suffering. ugh. but i wanted her to be here. healthy and here. with us. i wanted her to see brooklyn grow up. 

i wish she was here to meet and hold kendall.

i know exactly what she'd say about kendall if she held her today. she'd say, "oh my gosh melinda she's so darn cute! those cheeks!" it hurts. it hurts so much. i want to her to be here to see this cute chubby baby of mine. 


she's not here. she is in heaven and her body is whole. she is no longer suffering and that makes me so happy. i can imagine that she and my grandpa are having so much fun together. catching up, and looking down on us. being proud of us, i hope. and i really do feel like she had something to do with getting kendall here. i found out i was pregnant a week after her funeral. i can just picture her pleading my case up there, fighting for me like she always did. she knew how much i wanted another baby. she knew how much i suffered through my miscarriages. she did something up there to get this sweet baby to me. i truly believe that.

and i know she watches over us. i know she watches over my girls. she laughs with us and cries with us. i'm sure of it. i miss her so much. i miss so much about her. i'm so grateful for all of the good happy memories i have of her. i want to be like her. i hope she knows how much i love her. and if she doesn't, i can't wait to tell her when we see each other again.

and i imagine she'll want to spend a lot of time with these girls of mine.

but until then, we'll keep missing her and reminiscing all the great things there are to reminisce about her. i love you grandma! so so much!

p.s. today i will jog my daily jog in basketball shorts and listen to 90's boy bands in honor of that cute hip grandma of mine, and honestly, i think she'll laugh.

Monday, October 13, 2014

another weekend in october.

how was our week?

no, it really was good. i just love that sweet little mad look on her face. it's almost always there. i love it. our week was pretty good. we did have to go into the doctor really quick so brooklyn's ginormous mosquito bites could get checked out, and we also got our flu vaccinations. all happy at the end.

the leaves on all the trees are killing it lately. the one in our front yard is especially my favorite. and so far this fall, this is the only picture i have of it. i really need to get some better ones before the leaves are all gone.

there's that face again.

thursday evening, chelsea and i had a child free evening (thanks to james and my MIL) and got to go shower one of our friends who is about to have a baby girl in november. so exciting. it was fun to see her for a little bit and get to have some girl talk.

the weekend brought some relaxing and also some projects around the house. we even made a quick trip to logan to tail gate before the homecoming game (which we did not stay for). james's mba program was hosting, and all of brookyln's dreams came true when she saw a table full of donuts and hot chocolate. two of her favorite foods. it was so fun to be up in logan again. dinner at the bluebird and reminiscing all the way there. 

we headed home so that we could watch the game. we only made it to half time and then we all headed to bed. i felt like i'd run a marathon that day.

sunday was a quick trip to coalville for my nephew's blessing. that sweet little guy. didn't make a peep the whole time. in fact, he mostly slept through his dinner too. delicious food by the way.

haley has been here the last two nights and such a HUGE help. she's such a good little helper to me. we love when she's here. the girls love her too. thanks to her help, i got lots done this week and will be able to start my monday off right. i do have signs of a cold, including a sore throat, but hopefully the week will be a good one. 

h a p p y  m o n d a y 

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

october traditions

all our fall/halloween decor is up and tonight was our annual "ichabod/chocolate waffles night". i really need to come up with a better name. i'll work on that for next year. we had friends and family over for chocolate waffles/ice cream/caramel and to watch ichabod crane. outside!!! my favorite way to do it. we found a very generous family in our ward that owns one and we were able to borrow it for the night. it seriously makes this tradition so much better! i love using a projector outside.

besides watching the movie inside or outside depending on the circumstances, i don't think the tradition of the chocolate waffles will ever change. unless maybe we make them pumpkin waffles. they're so good!

the weather was perfect for a movie outside. it was cool, but not too cool. it really was a beautiful october night.

and how cute are they?

enjoying one of my favorite traditions of the year!

our favorite neighbors. 

jeremy and his gang showed up a little later to complete the get together. 

thank you to everyone who came to make this silly tradition so much fun for me!

and especially to my sister haley for coming hours earlier to help me housework, my kids, and getting everything ready for the night.

i love the picture below. i only wish we were all smiling. i feel like this depicts my every day life. totally captures it!

^^^my blue eyed girl and my gold bat shirt from wal-mart. love them both.^^^

i already can't wait for next year. but this especially makes me excited as it kicks off the awesome holiday season. and having kids around makes the holidays so much more fun!

until next year ichabod. {last year. the year before. and the first year of the tradition.}

h a p p y  halloween  s e a s o n !

Monday, October 6, 2014

conference weekend + fall so far

happy october! we are already five days in and i can hardly believe it. i love the cooler weather, pumpkin candles, and halloween right around the corner. brooklyn asks every day if it's time to go trick-or-treating. she also says that i am going to dress-up as a cat, and that kendall can't be a giraffe because it has nothing to do with halloween. 

our ward had our annual pumpkin pickin' at the ward garden this past monday. i love this tradition and really think it's the best. we are lucky enough to have a fabulous photographer in the ward who shares her talents and takes family pictures in front of the festive pumpkin stalk background. 

my MIL is here from hawaii and i've been learning the process of looking for and buying a house. she's a pro and hopefully i'll remember all the good tips i've learned. it is definitely something i look forward to and dread all at once. 

our halloween decorations are up and the girls have been sporting black and orange all week. we just can't help ourselves. 

we loved conference weekend and it went too fast. instead of baking bread, i made chocolate zucchini bread. my favorite!

we celebrated james' birthday with my family between the sunday sessions. his dinner request was chicken alfredo and tres leches cake for dessert. it was my mom's first go at tres leches cake and she totally nailed it. james was thrilled.

cutler is starting to get a little chub on him but kendall is definitely winning the chubby race. 

conference weekend always involves naps. i love this one of haley with kendall...

and this one of whitney and cutler. so cute!

brooklyn and livi played in their undies most of the day and made messes all throughout my parents' house. little tornadoes. 

my cute cousins were getting rid of this doll house and it ended up at my mom's. the girls love it!

life is good right now. we've moved into some good routines in the past month, james is in the depths of school, and we're gobbling up everything fall that we can.

like caramel apple spice drinks from starbucks. it's apple cider topped with whipped cream and caramel. heaven i tell you.

our front porch is bursting with pumpkins, our beds are begging for flannel sheets, and my girls are growing like weeds. life is good. life is sweet. the every day is oh so good. even when it's full of chaos. i love it. oh so much!

h a p p y  m o n d a y !